Birthday gift for him

MICHAEL DEVELOPED TYPE 1 diabetes when he was 9 years old. When we got together, almost 30 years ago, I knew next to nothing about diabetes. One night my husband woke up with severe low blood glucose. He was talking crazy; I thought that he was having a nervous breakdown.

After we got to the hospital, and after my husband received an injection of glucagon, he sheepishly explained to me what had happened.

The next year a local university offered a one-week class for people with diabetes. My husband wanted me to go with him, and afterwards I was glad I had. I learned that living well with diabetes was a challenging balancing act. Blood glucose wasn't supposed to get too high or too low. I was informed about the very serious health consequences of wildly fluctuating blood glucose over extended periods of time, and I learned about the importance of exercise and following a healthy diet.

I could see that diabetes was not just my husband's problem. I had a role to play as well. In fact, I saw how important it was for everyone in our family to embrace a healthy lifestyle. We all got used to eating healthy, which, for us, meant very little meat and no fried foods, fast foods, cheese, sugary desserts, or alcohol. Both my husband and I also tried to exercise every day.

I know that stress causes blood glucose to rise, and I would like to say that my husband and I never argue and that our house is always serene and peaceful. But the truth is, sometimes we do argue, and it's not completely unusual for him to start yelling after reading something in the paper. But he still has an A1C of 5.8.

Michael checks his blood glucose often, about 10 times a day. I ask him if it bothers him to be checking so much, pricking himself over and over, and he tells me he's used to it.

We have both learned to appreciate the clean, free feeling that comes with exercise. And we have learned to enjoy the taste of fresh vegetables, fruit, oatmeal, whole-wheat bread, brown rice, and, yes, tofu.

This year my husband reached a milestone: He turned 50, with no health problems.

At his birthday party nobody seemed to notice the fact that he wasn't eating the cake or drinking the wine. And nobody seemed to notice me getting a little misty a couple of times.

Leslie Goldberg is a writer living in Sonoma, Calif.