Wedding attendant gift cheap

10-year-old using a phony photo on Web

Dear Abby: I am a 10-year-old girl who has been playing after school on a Web site for pet lovers. I like to talk to kids older than me -- 14- or- 15-year-olds. A lot of the boys I've talked to have asked for my picture, so I went to Google and found a picture of a pretty blond girl around 15 years old. I have been sending this picture to all the people who have asked me for one.

My mom looked into my e-mail and saw what I had done. Now she won't allow me on that site or to send pictures, either my own or a stranger's, to anyone.

Was she right to look at my e-mail? Is it really dangerous to do what I did? --Grounded in Orinda, Calif.

Dear Grounded: Yes, and yes! When someone asks for your picture, that person is interested in more than just talking about pets. Although you are intelligent, at age 10 you are not experienced enough to be in a relationship with boys who are 14 and 15. And on some level, I think you are already aware of it, or you would not have sent out pictures of a pretty blond teenage girl who is older. You are lucky to have a mother who is vigilant and protective of your safety. She may have helped you dodge a bullet.

Dear Abby: After reading the responses to "All Tipped Out's" letter, I was reminded of a question that I have.

I frequent a certain nightclub, and in the ladies' room there is an array of toiletries and breath mints. There is also a tip jar and an attendant. I visit the club almost every week, and sometimes I leave a tip and sometimes I don't.

One night I was merely looking at a bottle of cologne and the attendant screamed at me that I could use it only if I left a tip. Another time, I saw a girl eat one of the mints, and the woman demanded money for it.

Was this appropriate? I was under the impression that, because I pay a cover charge to get into the club, I was not obligated to put money in the tip jar -- even if I used the cologne. Besides, doesn't the club pay for the cologne and candy?--Would Like to Know

Dear Would: The club may pay minimum wage to the attendant, but the supplies she brings -- the makeup, perfume, gum, candy, etc., are paid for by the attendant. They are her "concession" and her chance to make extra money. The cover charge you pay to get into the club does not include those "extras," so if you use them, you should give the person who provides them a gratuity.

Dear Abby: My boyfriend and I have been invited to a wedding -- sort of. The bride and groom planned this wedding before the groom's divorce was final. It still isn't final, but the couple has decided to go ahead with the affair, minus the ceremony.

My boyfriend is in the "bridal party" and has to rent a tuxedo. I have already spent a lot of money on a beautiful dress.

Must we also buy this couple a wedding gift? They are not actually being married at this time. My thought is to hold off until they actually tie the knot. What do you think? --Doesn't Want to Be Cheap in NYC

Dear Doesn't: What you have described is not a wedding -- it's a costume party. Give them a token gift, and if the marriage ever happens, send them something when it's official.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.© Universal Press Syndicate